Did the Jews Blow Up Krakatoa? A Tale of Death and Mayonnaise

For many years I had been casually interested in the powerful explosion of Krakatoa in the Sunda  Strait in 1883. As a small boy I had vaguely heard of it, as I had of dinosaurs, and accepted it as it was always described, an enormous volcanic eruption. This appeared reasonable, especially if one accepted the contemporary descriptions as they appeared in the many written accounts. There seemed no reason to doubt.

I accepted the official story, as I had the government’s story of Nine-Eleven until evidence began to appear that the building’s were destroyed by micro-nukes and directed energy weapons. And of course, I didn’t think much about Krakatoa at all, being busy with my work and the quotidian demands of life.

I consequently was shocked when a friend, whom I will call Eric, who had always seemed rational and measured in his thinking, suggested that the Jews had caused the explosion. I was inclined to dismiss the idea as crackpot, a “conspiracy theory.” It made no sense.

Then, at Eric’s suggestion, I began reading more carefully. I was surprised at what I found. In all the books I read, in accounts by Indonesians who were there at the time, there was no evidence of Jewish involvement. None. This seemed strange and, as I reluctantly came to think, damning.

As Eric pointed out, initiating an explosion so enormous, almost no matter how it was done, would have involved hundreds if not thousands of people, dozens of ships, many interrelated paper trails, and collusion at high political levels. Only a group with almost absolute control of society could have suppressed all of this without a trace. What was the only group with such influence?

The Jews, Eric said. Any other group would have left telltale tracks. That there were none left only one possible set of malefactors.

I at first resisted the idea. I knew of other accounts of hidden conspiracies by Jews that seemed ridiculous. For example, the perennial reports that Jews sacrifice Christian children. I long dismissed these as resulting from virulent paranoia, thinking that the only people who wanted to sacrifice Christian children were, occasionally, Christian parents. Many of these tales dated to medieval times when it was common to believe in witches, incubi and succubae, hexes and enchantments. I doubted whether the stories were true even then, and thought laughable the idea that my dentist was making Christian children into matzoh balls and eating them, presumably with mayonnaise from the Jewish mayonnaise interests. Think Hellman’s.

If such sacrifices were happening, I said, why were no children missing? Surely their parents would notice. There is evidence, Eric said, that they are replaced by holographic projections, like the ones used to make people think that airplanes ran into the Twin Towers.

I remained skeptical.  Over the years I had encountered many Jews, such as Ike Feinstein who owned the delicatessen near my home. He, and indeed all the Jews I had known seemed harmless. Most were dentists or doctors or otherwise useful people. Had such apparently harmless folk caused the greatest non-nuclear detonation since the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs? It seemed absurd.

But Krakatoa. On closer examination I noticed that in all the contemporary documents I had read, including many from the English-language press in Jakarta, there were no Jewish names. This was very odd. Even in the late nineteenth century, Indonesia had a large population. Jews were an international people, being found across the globe. That there were no Jewish names could only mean that they had changed them. This was consistent with the suppression of evidence of having arranged the explosion. It was plausible. I had met Jews named Miller and Smith.

Name-changing by Jews was simply a fact. I once knew a Jew named Hyman Baum who taught programming at the University of Kansas. He signed his name “H. Ezekiel Baum,” got tired of people saying, “Billy, I want you to meet Aitch Bawmb. Be careful! He’s got a short fuse! Haw haw!” He changed his name to Solomon Goldberg.

My awakening continued.

I wondered how the Brethren, as Eric called them, could have caused so enormous a detonation. In the 1880s, explosives were primitive. How…?

Eric pointed to the well-known formula that describes the increase in weight—mass, actually—that occurs with velocity. This equation falls out of Special Relativity, published by Albert Einstein (Jewish: See?) in 1905. In layman’s terms, the faster you go, the more you weight.

W_v = W₀/(1 – (v²/c²))^1/2

This shows that you can lose weight simply by holding still. Significantly, textbooks of physics, which are often written by Jews, fail to mention this. Who would want to hide a means of losing weight? There is evidence that the omission was forced by the Jewish mayonnaise interest and their collaborators, substantially responsible for the current obesity in America, as they do not want the public to consider losing weight, as by eating less mayonnaise—Hellman’s: Again, note the name.

Mayonnaise of course has nothing to do with Krakatoa, so far as we know.

Eric then pointed me to the writings of Maimonides Figlitz, a little-known physicist. Figlitz made the obvious observation that if you gain weight—again, actually mass—by going forward, then you would lose weight by going backward.  The greater your backward velocity, the less you would weigh. But the two directions are not symmetrical. Your mass can increase without limit as you go forward, but when going backward you can lose only the weight you start with.

Figlitz has calculated that, when your weight reaches zero, a singularity occurs, a space-time compression in which, at least in theory, one might pop out in the past, the emergence time depending on the backward velocity at the initiation of singularity.

Might this explain how the Jews arrived at Krakatoa? There is no conclusive evidence of this, such as observations of Jews going backward very fast, but they could have done it in remote regions or at night. There have been UFO reports consistent with this.

Everything began to fit. Was it possible…? If Israeli agents were going back in time by exploiting the retro-velocital singularity, then the stupendous explosion of Krakatoa could be explained as a nuclear event. Jewish scientists after all had invented nuclear explosives—Einstein, Oppenheimer, Szilard, Teller. Could it be…? Israeli agents from Dimona in the Negev certainly had the technical capacity to construct a hugely powerful bomb, probably a hydrogen bomb. The radiation would have been diluted in the waters of the Indian Ocean and Pacific in the more than a century that has passed since the event. Tellingly, I could find no media accounts of scientists looking for trace radiation in the Strait. Who controls the media?

Why would the Jews want to blow up Krakatoa? Eric told me of research by a friend, who died suddenly, who found in a remote monastery in Sumatra the draft of a patent application by a local Indonesian businessman, who had lived on Krakatoa, for a proprietary sauce he had invented. Yes, you guessed it. Krakatoa was blown up, and thousands killed, to protect—the Jewish mayonnaise interests.